01 - Combine ground beef, salt, pepper, garlic powder, and onion powder in a large bowl. Gently mix until just incorporated, being careful not to overwork the meat. Form into 4 equal patties, using your thumb to press a slight dimple into the center of each patty to prevent puffing during cooking.
02 - Preheat grill or cast iron skillet over medium-high heat until hot but not smoking. The surface should be hot enough to sear the meat immediately upon contact.
03 - Place patties on the preheated grill or skillet and cook for 3-4 minutes on the first side. Flip and cook for another 3-4 minutes. During the final minute of cooking, place a slice of sharp cheddar cheese on each patty and cover with a lid or dome to melt the cheese completely.
04 - While burgers are cooking, combine mayonnaise, ranch dressing, chopped chives, Worcestershire sauce, and smoked paprika in a small bowl. Whisk thoroughly until all ingredients are fully incorporated and the mixture is smooth and uniform. Set aside until assembly.
05 - Lightly butter the cut sides of the brioche buns if desired. Place on the grill or in a toaster until golden brown and slightly crispy, approximately 1-2 minutes. Watch closely to prevent burning.
06 - Spread a generous layer of crack sauce on both the top and bottom bun. On the bottom bun, layer shredded lettuce, followed by the cheesy burger patty, 2 slices of crispy bacon, fresh tomato slices, and pickles. Crown with the top bun and press gently.
07 - Serve the burgers immediately while hot and juicy. For best results, let the burgers rest for 2-3 minutes after assembly to allow the flavors to meld and prevent the sauce from making the bun soggy too quickly.